Deadly Ever After

Archive for the tag “sick”

My Dumb Sick Day

TODAY’S BREW: Water. I am feeling a little punched in the face today.

By Julie

Today, I feel like crap. I think this soul-sucking tetanus shot that I was due for did it to me. Let me give you a brief overview. I go to the doctor for an innocent little physical. Moments later, I’m having blood drawn, being jabbed mercilessly with a needle while the tech tells me it’s coming out really slow, until I get really light headed and start hurking into the trash can while saying how embarassed I am and eating tiny peppermint patties for comfort/nourishment/condolences. WHATEVER, STUPID SHOT, IT’S YOUR FAULT, YOU HAPPENED FIRST.

These are the things I want for my sick day that isn’t even really a sick day but I feel like crap and even napped, so here, indulge me because I came home with clothes in a biohazard bag from the doctor’s office today, and that’s real.

1.  A hot water bottle like old people use

2.  A Twilight movie marathon. No joke, I want that.

3.  To never move from under this fuzzy orange blanket.

4.  Someone to rub my feet and tell me I’m a pretty, pretty princess.

5.  One and one half gallons of Earl Grey tea.

6.  A Sears Christmas catalog to leaf through. Not the new one which is a glorified pamphlet. The old one, the one that mattered. The Wish Book.

7.  After the Twilight marathon, The Golden Girls.

8.  Six naps.

9.  A bunch of people to go buy J.C. Michael’s Discoredia right here

There is no number ten. I’m not greedy, just wanty.

Taking donations of above items now.


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